Friday, February 18, 2011

let me tell you somethin' 'bout my beeeest frieeeeeend

February is the month of my best friendaversary with 2 of my 3 best friends. And since I can't remember exactly when the one other became a BFF, I'm just going to recognize all of them today. In chronological order-of-friendship:

A-Train and I met in high school. In junior year. When I had only lived in Delaware for about 3 months. And we were both in the school play. And my family's house was walking distance from the school. So I'd walked to play practice, into the hall full of kids that I didn't know yet, and all of a sudden I heard a voice from the direction of the floor. And it said, "Hey! Hey you!"

I turned to look, and there was A-Train, laying on the floor with his head in somebody's lap, looking up at me. "Yeah, you," he said. "Socks and sandals went out with the '80s. Kgr8thxbai."

Yes, he actually talked like that. And yes, I had worn the most egregious of footwear combinations into the lion's den. But I was just going to slip off the sandals! There was no point in bothering with non-slip on shoes for a 2 minute walk! Ugh.

We weren't friends right away. He had a habit of deciding he hated people and then starting "I Hate [Your Name Here]" clubs, which really consisted of grabbing unsuspecting hands and writing "IH[Initial]" on them. And BAM you were in the club, and were displaying the fact that you hated someone. Apparently. Then one time after we were friends, in his eagerness to buy cigarettes, he drove over a curb and blew out a tire, which I changed. After I dug the spare out from under a pile of Britney Spears paraphernalia. Then I told him to tighten the nuts while I put everything else away, and he didn't, and the wheel almost flew off during the remainder of the drive to the mall. He's gotten better at following directions since then.

We've been through a lot of stuff together. A lot of big, important, terrifying stuff. And I don't know when he became a best friend, but one day, after some Important Stuff, he just was. And always will be.

My Best Friend Who Reads (MBFWR going forward) and I were in a writing group together, which had been organized by a mutual friend. On the first night, there were 5 of us in the room, and one of the prompts was to write a single sentence about one other person in attendance. We were the only 2 who wrote about each other. I thought for sure she wouldn't come back, because she looked too put-together to associate with dorky writer types like the rest of us. Turns out she is a WAY bigger dorky writer type than ANY of the rest of us. At the next meeting (in February of 2007), she grabbed my phone out of my hands without asking. Also one of the other members of the group wrote consistently depressing pieces, and we giggled about it. These 2 things seal the deal for friendship in my mind. Loyalty? Similar values? Puh-shaw! I just want them to take my stuff and laugh at people with me!

One time she was determined to win a goldfish at a carnival, and she did, but then we took it to my house so we wouldn't have to carry it, and it totally committed suicide. It was a carnival OF EMOTIONS for her. I just laughed. Which did not make her feel better. Sometimes I'm a crappy friend. But she keeps coming back for more. It's probably because sometimes I make her Italian food, and homegirl canNOT say "no" to eggplant parmigiana. Seriously. It's kind of ridiculous.

My Ship and I were also introduced by a mutual friend (in February of 2008). She was new to the area, and our mutual friend suggested she ask me if I wanted to go out one night. We got drunk and danced and took pictures and fell in friendlove. In one email, she said (and I'm paraphrasing here), "We're like 2 sexy ships passing in the sexy night. Sexily." I have no idea why. At the time I guess it made sense. But now we are Ships, and I say it a lot when I'm drunk, which is probably mostly annoying to other people. But if they had a ship they'd understand.

Sometimes I get drunk at her house and knock soy sauce onto her white carpet and start saying math stuff in my sleep. Reading these 2 paragraphs makes me think I have some alcohol issues. Ironically, she gave up alcohol for Lent last year and she was M I S E R A B L E. I'm sure Jesus was happy about it, though. Tonight I'm going to meet up with her for...a drink...but tomorrow we're coordinating a wedding! Where we will NOT be drinking! So you can wipe that judgy look right off your face.

Ta da! Happy Friendaversary, best friends!

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